| » Poem: promises (broken) |
promises (broken)
written by SilentScreamsofDeath09:06 AM 10/12/04"Life isn't fair" is the most truthful statement I've heard
and "I love you, Scott" - love's the most painful word -
on one side it's the best, its so beautiful, so good
and on the other, it hurts more than anyone could.
Because when you hurt from love, it's not something you can ignore
love comes from within you, if you run, it will only hurt more
Falling in love with her was the best feeling I'd ever felt
and the loss of her love was the worst blow life has dealt
I've done more crying than I can remember
and through it all I can say I still love her
but I am forced to acknowledge sadly
that she was lying when she said she'd always love me
Did I ever really mean anything to her?
was I really special or was I just another?
another heart broken, another person destroyed
whats more painful, the end, or the means that are employed?
I have made one promise that I have not broken
I promised I would never give up, no matter how badly heartbroken
is it really worth it, to suffer through this
just for the satisfaction of the one who gave me death's kiss?
I don't have the strength to keep getting hurt
I don't need it proven again that I am less than dirt
You dont need to tell me it will all be okay
for I know it's just bullshit, it won't be that way
The last years have proven that that was a lie,
the only way it will get better, is if i die.
I cant stop feeling this, I cant numb the pain
but I can end it, that much is plain.
I don't know if I have the courage or not,
to take my own life (what life?) what strength have I got?
I have nothing thats not borrowed feelings
which come from the friends and the failed healings
When it comes down to it, I have nothing at all,
except pain, sweet pain, endless pain, endless hurt
and the knowledge that it was all for naught, that it was all
from the first moment, destined to end
Well, I can never be sure, as to her intentions
but I can be sure that I don't plan to stay around
if all I'm here for
is to be smashed into the ground
If I suddenly disappear, if my life ended
even if I didn't do it, it was what I intended
I don't know if I will be here tomorrow
but if not, my friends, know i did not mean any sorrow
I dont want you to hurt on my behalf
if I am gone, be happy, that my pain is gone
and please remember me as the person I was
before the pain piled on.
If I am still here, tomorrow and the day after
I will still be your friend, and I will still love her
I won't make any promises, I want to live, but I don't
the best days are behind me, the best memories
of when life was pure and wonderful and I wanted to be there
when I was with her the joy was everywhere
I wanted to be with her for the rest of time
but it wasnt meant to happen, the happiness was wiped away by time
time is the enemy
time makes all that is good worthless
for in a thousand years
no-one will even remember I said this
in a thousand years
my name won't ring a bell
and nobody will know
of my life in this hell
my suffering through this, wont mean a thing
to those who have never heard my crying
to my friends - you have done more for me
than you will ever know, just listening to me
just being around, a shoulder to cry on
is enough to convince me
that i should live on
i wont ask anything
anymore, from anyone
but just dont break a promise,
if you're going to make one.
why wont you let me let go? |
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| » Comments / Feedback | by lifescolddeath (11-21-2004 - 11:56 PM)
by CatGoddess (12-30-2004 - 08:00 AM)
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