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Untitled
written by Debi07:18 PM 12/18/04She wishes she could disapear
and then one day she did
they all said she tried too hard
thought she'd never give up.
she was envious of the butterflies
all so beautiful and free
because she always felt so trapped
she felt so alone.
When surrounded with people
she tries to hide her feelings
but always wears them on her sleeve
people ask her why she never smiles.
But could they possibly understand?
have they seen what she's saw
had her experiences
been hurt so bad
they wanted to die?
She's too scared to die
but more so to go on
She watches the flowers bloom
and thinks they should be free
it's not right to be stuck in one place
to never see the world
she knows what that's like
she's been prisoner her whole life
held captive by her own thoughts
she knows mostly sadness
but pretends to be happy.
People look right through her
don't even know she's there
all she's ever wanted
was to be like the others
but she will always be different
for there's something they'll never see
behind that fake smile
is the pain for something lost.
she tries to drink the memories away
of the rape, death, and hurt
but then one time
someone took advantage
it's hard for her to trust guys
but she thinks she finally found the one
to give her heart out to.
She still occasionally cries at night
wondering why this happened
she blamed herself
for what else could it be?
If she had only listened
she would have been home that night
not in a tent
that stormy night
drinking herself into oblivion.
She'd still be at home
not feeling all alone
but she listened to her friends
did what she knew was wrong
not only hurting herself
her family had to pay
it hert them to say good bye
but she was her sisters role model
and she hurt her sister badly
she never wanted to
she loves her sister like a daughter
but thought of no one but herself. |
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