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» Poem: never know
never know
written by suicide-fairie
02:58 PM 2/19/05
Nothings going right
nothing at all
i need to talk to you
but the computer is screwed
il have to deal will this one on my own
i cant talk bout my feelings over the phone
too many listning ears
go for a cold shower
numb the body up so it doesnt hurt too much
drag the scissors across my skin
wotch the skin as it rips apart
i feel bad for lying i feel bad for breaking my promise
but if it wasnt for me falling in love with you i wouldnt be doing this the now
its all in my head..
i dont wanna be doing this
but before i know iam doing it its done
selfharm aint no fun anymore
i hate myself for doing this
it makes me wanna hurt myself more knowing that ive broke your promise yet again
why did i make that promise?
when i new i couldnt keep it
one night all will be told
you will find out and you will go like you did before
i couldnt handle losing you
so i puke the guilt up watch it flush away
its still there flowing threw my veins
i can feel the tears coming as i try my hardest to hold them back
im fedup crying because my heart is broke and it dont know what its doing
i keep falling..once apon a time it felt good to hit the floor
now apon a time it dont hurt no more
but i stil did what i did
nothing can change that
its over and done as much as i wanna forget it i cant
the scars show
they will always be there to remember me how fucked up i really am
how no one could ever love me
becuase iam a nobody
i tryed so hard to be perfect just for you but nobody is perfect whats the point of trying
i tryed so hard to keep my promise just for you because of te fear of losing you
ive broke my promise and il get what i deserve
i guess you have always known that i would let you down like i have done everyone else
i just feel like you dont care anymore
you make me happy but now your just making me feel sad without knowing
sorry but my minds just messed up "i dont know what iam thinking"
i dont know what iam doing half the time
GOD WHY?
why did i have to fall in love?
why are you doing this to me?
is this to make me weaker?
bring my selfesteem lower i never thought that would be possible
i want alcohol because im weak..cause i cant cope
and i dont care anymore
iam beeing selfish...IAM SELFISH
if i had drugs i would do them but i dont so alcohol will do for now
drink till i cant feel anything till im lying passed out on the floor
so many pointless things to do
things that will make you hate me even more
but you aint ever gonna read this so he will never know
he allready know i love him
n thats as far as he is gonna know
he dont need to know anymore..
iam just a person a person broken hearted like most off the world
so this is going out to the broken hearted to everyone who has ever felt down
who no longer tells there feelings because there scared of reactions...
im gonna cry myself to sleep and pray tomorrow is better
you never know what is gonna come..


All (c)Copyrights reserved by the Original Author.

Author's footnotes and comments on this Poem:
i really dont like this but its eh longest poem iv ever done lolololololz, feel free to slate it!

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