| » Poem: Suicide2 |
Suicide2
written by lifelessangel02:34 PM 3/15/05Warm tears fall from cold eyes,
Running down pure white skin,
Leaving trails of black mascara behind,
Picking up a blood red rose,
It slowly turns black,
The colour of her heart,
The colour of her blood,
She doesn't want to cry anymore,
Wanting the pain to be taken away,
She picks up the blade,
Starting to cut,
This isn't enough,
It makes her worse,
She wants this to end,
She's sick of this life,
Picking up the pills,
She slowly takes one after another,
Until she's emptied the packet,
She feels fine,
Then suddenly she feels dizzy,
Falls to the floor unconscious,
Her mother enters the room,
Talks to her, but she doesn't respond,
She calls for the paramedics,
They enter the room,
It's too late, she's passed away,
The mother breaks down and crys,
Her soul as left her body,
Now she regrets it,
How could one lad,
Of made her feel so bad. |
All (c)Copyrights reserved by the Original Author.
Author's footnotes and comments on this Poem:
This is what i nearly did all because i never let other people know how i feel
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This Poem has been viewed 85 times
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| » Comments / Feedback | by Dianesjewels (3-15-2005 - 03:25 PM)
| The beginning is good, then you lose your poetic form, with only a few good lines after the first stanza. This one has potential, but you need to write the ending as well as you wrote the beginning.
That said, it was alright. |
by kat_the_twat (3-15-2005 - 08:51 PM)
| well I think its great. xxx |
by holmesy (3-16-2005 - 12:31 AM)
| was this as a result of anyone i know or just a poem expressing feelings?
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by depressed_lil_angel (3-16-2005 - 01:39 AM)
| no matter how low a guy makes you feel never let him drive you to that no matter how much you love him or how much he has hurt you. you can't be driven to that by a guy or by anyone. its a great poem it made me cry because i realised how close i was to loosing you yesterday all because of liam and i never even noticed that he had hurt you so much. never let yourself take it that far i dont know what i would do if u did i love u bex XxXxX |
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