| » Poem: Change |
Change
written by Deadkittycat08:51 PM 3/16/05Its hard to say this but I dont love you
i was struggling and you visiously pulled me through
you want me to change ...to act different than I am
..please no not this again
I sit straight with a pole in my spine
and hold my head up like everythings just fine
you hold me too tight like your voiceing my body saying MINE!
how can i be so speachless...so blind....
I am weak ...and weak i am ... I will never find a good man
that will treat me right ..
the last I had I loved but we had alot of fights
now hes gone
and its been so long
I have to get out of his embrace
because its soon to be my disgrace |
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| » Comments / Feedback | by blurredvisions (3-16-2005 - 08:57 PM)
| the rhyme schemes too obvious and although it is an awesome idea, try to make the sylabols (can't spell!!) equal to some extent. good job... oh and a question: what does this mean? "you hold me too tight like your voiceing my body saying MINE!"
It doesn't make sense to me... |
by Deadkittycat (3-18-2005 - 02:09 AM)
| if ya think about it you would know but i guess not and man i dont even care if i cant spell or if my poem is good or not i feel great after writing them if you knew anything you'd know that. |
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