| » Poem: "Being Like You" (please comment) |
"Being Like You" (please comment)
written by XxXstitchesXxX11:24 PM 3/1/05I sit in my room crying from pain,
thinking of the hurt you that rained.
How it felt when you told me,
that no more were we a family.
All it did was cause me harm,
and because of that it scared my arm.
I hated you, I wished for you to die,
because all I wanted to see was you cry.
I hurt myself because of you,
you were never true.
You always lied,
and I always cried.
And now Im through,
I have no need to be like you. |
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This Poem has been viewed 393 times
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| » Comments / Feedback | by Xxmy_life_sucksxX (3-1-2005 - 11:34 PM)
| this was a really really good poem |
by drowningkitten14 (3-1-2005 - 11:47 PM)
| i love youre poem, it really expresses youre feelings |
by (guest) (3-1-2005 - 11:54 PM)
by xwhatitis2burn8x (3-2-2005 - 12:42 AM)
| it was ok. the intentions and emotions were strong, which is important. it was very easy to relate to which is why i think you got so much positive feedback. however the wording wasn't as good as it could have been. parts of the poem did not make sense. like certtain lines were misplaced and their ideas would have been better in another part of the poem. you have good potential keep it up and youll get better!! |
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